This letter was printed in the National Post on February 22, 2006.

"CHOICE IN CHILDBIRTH" by Heather Mains

As an aromatherapy-burning Wiccan doula (sans hat), I decided to go to York University and conduct a year-long study on women's perceptions of coping in the childbirth process. My personal experience had been of having two children in hospital, the first with an epidural, artificial labour-enhancing drugs, an episiotomy and forceps that dragged my first-born son out into the world. I had never been to a home birth up to this point.
When I conducted this Canadian study, hearing directly from women and comparing birth experiences, I was surprised to learn that the women who had chosen epidurals said they felt more disconnected, uncomfortable, less in control and more limited in their labours with the epidural than during the period before the epidural. Most of these women said they would not choose epidurals again, but look towards non-drug support instead. They cited their lack of feeling, the lack of sense of their babies in their own bodies and an overwhelming sense of having birth "done to them" by others versus "giving birth" themselves.
What's more, in my 12-year-old practice of attending women throughout their entire labours, I found another consistent surprise. When women are asked if they have considered the option of birthing in the comfort and familiarity of their own home with a qualified birth attendant, many lower their voices and say things like, "I would consider it, but my husband is so scared that he cannot even have the conversation, so I can't." What does this say about women having real choice, based on their needs as birth-giving women? It's a sad comment that they feel so restricted.
Some days, I wish men could give birth, so their comments would be informed by experience rather than fear. Heather Mains, Toronto